Gipson Family Update: Back to the Beginning

So it was around 8 months ago that God led us to leave our home and my pastorate and relocate in Knoxville, TN. It was a step of faith, a hard step, and we hoped God had something special for us on the other side. And indeed He did…just not at all what we expected.

*Hopefully you already know the reason we made that radical step: my sister-in-law and her boys. They lost their husband and dad on Father’s Day 2019 when a drunk driver struck and killed Claude Williams. Our family had already lost a grandfather earlier that year, so I knew this was going to be especially tough.

Meanwhile, I was pastoring a church in St Louis. We’d made some steps forward in two years there after 30 years of decline. But frankly, what was happening now in my family felt a lot more urgent than my job. God could bring any pastor to lead that church, but we felt there was a specific need with my sister-in-law’s family in Knoxville only we could fill. So we decided to resign my church, put our home up for sale, and move to Knoxville and help out. We weren’t really sure what that meant or for how long, but we knew it was what God wanted.

When we arrived, I knew I had to work hard on several fronts. First, I needed to establish a relationship with my 3 nephews. Honestly, I’d never spent much time with them when their dad was alive; I didn’t think they needed another father figure. So now I had to start from scratch, get to know them, and earn their trust. Claude had been the main disciplinarian, and two of them were now bigger than their mom Twila. So I sensed she needed “back up” to be sure they’d always respect her and take her authority seriously. So I began attending their sports activities, and taking them to breakfast or lunch for little “talks” about how to behave properly. They listened respectfully, so these chats weren’t difficult. And I’d drop over every couple of days, either for our families to eat together or do some random chores with them around their house.

But also, I needed to look for work. We’d just lost a full-time salary, I still had my own family to support, and our home was not selling quickly in St Louis. When we arrived, I found two part-time ministry opportunities I’d hoped would become something to help us stay in Knoxville long term. However, the more time I spent with them, the more it became clear neither would be the right thing for me.

It’s tough when you listen to God, do what He says, but your life is still so unsatisfying. But I know God doesn’t always call us toward happiness in the short term. Sometimes, he calls us to uncertainty and even suffering. We take refuge in the promise of “surely goodness and mercy shall follow me” at the end of Psalm 23, but forget before that came a walk “through the valley of the shadow of death”. Fear and uncertainty are almost always fellow travelers along the road to our destiny.

And while the rest of our family was suffering much greater loss, I was losing lots of sleep wondering just what God was doing with my own little family.

But after several months, I began to recognize some great things were happening. One of the best was the church we all began attending together with Twila and the boys: Sevier Heights. Though they ran over 3000 people every Sunday, their young pastor and his wife took special interest in the challenges my sister-in-law was facing. They set up free professional counseling for her and her boys, helping them walk through the trauma they’d just experienced. The boys got involved in their terrific youth group, and the pastor’s wife invited Twila to her weekly small group. Additionally, there were great Christians in the boys’ school system who gathered around the family to help. Through all these people, God was putting a strong support system around their family.

As for my family, we were making it. We were living in my mother-in-law’s basement, which was fine. But right after we arrived, we discovered she’d be moving and the house put up for sale. This gave us a sense of urgency to find our own place, but with no permanent jobs in sight for me, we didn’t see how to move forward.

So instead of putting our two little girls in school and perhaps having to pull them out suddenly, Dawn went to work homeschooling them both. She made that basement more functional than I would’ve thought it could be, cooking full suppers in a minimal kitchen (even with no oven or stove). She washed innumerable dishes by hand in that little kitchen sink. She found dance and art classes for the girls, and they both loved the kids programs at our church. She even got a part-time job for a while, although it was hard for her to stand for long periods of time with her injured leg. But she stood up under a great deal of pressure, and grew closer than ever with her sister and tried to be there for her as she processed their tragedy.

I already knew I had an amazing wife, but she was nothing short of astounding these past months with so much uncertainly and challenges at every turn.

However, by December it was clear to me that the things I was doing where not going to be fill the gaps for me financially or in ministry. Also, I had put out resumes to most every church looking for a pastor within a hundred miles, and…nothing. Even churches I felt way over-qualified for were not responding. So either I suddenly was useless as a pastor, or God was shutting doors to me in East Tennessee. In fact, He was shutting every single door.

But around that same time, doors seemed to be opening in an odd place: back in Naples, FL where we’d moved from to go to St Louis. We’d loved Naples and spent 11 years of our lives there. We started a church, and I’d been involved in some great theatre at the Naples Players. I was even writing articles every month for the local newspaper! Best of all, we’d developed some tremendous friendships. We’d only left because we simply couldn’t make a living.

First, I noticed some theatre opportunities there that seemed created just for me, especially the one looking for an actor my age who could do comedy, sing AND play a piano! Then I heard about a church there looking for a pastor. A friend of mine was the interim pastor now, and he encouraged me to pursue it. Then my old theatre group there needed someone to sing for a special event and asked me. Then there was a gig playing piano for a concert of Judy Garland songs. And then, I had lunch with another friend and learned of yet another possible church opportunity.

Then we finally had an offer on our house from St Louis. We needed to get our remaining furniture out and would soon have some freedom in our finances. But should we move everything into storage in Knoxville where we couldn’t see any future? We were still stuck in a basement, and even that was for sale! My sister-in-law and the boys were now doing great and had a better support system in Knoxville than we did. And while I was talking with two churches in Florida now, nothing was definite. So what should we do?

Everything important God’s asked us to do in our lives has taken faith. We had started a church in faith, we’d adopted children well into our 50s in faith, we’d left a church and moved to Knoxville in faith. And it appeared now He was asking us to trust Him again. We were to recognize the doors He’d closed, and move toward the doors He was so clearly opening.

And so, we packed up our furniture in St Louis and sent the truck straight to Naples, FL. It’s Tuesday morning now, and only two days ago late Sunday night I drove our U-Haul truck into the driveway of our new Florida rental home.

God had let me know part of His purpose for this season in my life was to get my eyes off my position as pastor and my church as a job, and to trust completely in Him. He also wanted me to know He valued me not for what I was doing in His name, but just because I was His child.

For 7 months, I sat in a church and listened to worship, but didn’t lead it anymore. I worshipped, cried, and found new intimacy with God while sitting in His “waiting room”. In fact, after being in dry places for so long, I believe I learned how to really worship again. I listened as another younger man preached, and realized God had something to say to me with every sermon. By watching that church wrap their love around my sister-in-law’s family, my faith in the power of Church was renewed and reaffirmed.

I’m looking around our new little rental house here in Florida now. The girls just ran through the living room as they get ready for school, fighting over a hair bow they both want to wear. There are still lots of boxes to unpack and more furniture on the way. The closing of our house in St Louis is not until tomorrow. Yet, I know we are finally home.

We wait expectantly to see how this new season will unfold. There are still many unanswered questions, but at least we now know the direction we’re going. Most of all, we’re so thankful for all our friends who’ve prayed us through this season, and for Twila who encouraged us to move on into what God was doing in our lives. We’ll miss our family left in Knoxville, but hope to see them soon.

By the way, my sister-in-law is an amazing lady whose story is going to help many, many people. Please check out her blog at TwilasThoughts.com.

We’re right back where we started, but on a completely new adventure. God is writing a truly exciting story, with a plot twist around most every corner. Thanks so much for going on the journey with us. I can’t wait to see how the story ends.

God bless,

Dave