I’ve been working on a full-scale musical now in that chair, in front of that keyboard pictured above for about 10 years now. Writing a show is a long process of stops and starts. You create songs you thought were great and then the next day realize are mediocre and discard them. The past several months of rehearsal have been a series of script rewrites that never seem to end.
I’m sure my actors have run out of ink in their printers a long time ago.
The reality is creating something is a lonely, discouraging process. I don’t mean to whine, but I’ve serious considered scrapping the whole thing at times. Not because it’s trash, but for lack of mental stamina to just keep going forward.
So when a cast member’s mom told me yesterday how good my show is, it was perfect timing. She said she read the script the night before and thought it was powerful. Then she relayed how her daughter had taken one of my songs to work on with her voice teacher, and the teacher ended up in tears by the end of the song.
I’m assuming the tears meant she was moved and not because she was hoping my lousy song would end. Insert awkward smiley face here!
What this lady didn’t know is I’d just had a terrible day, with several discouraging things happening one after the other. Our family is in the process of moving, and obstacles seem to be standing in line to throw us off track. So when she said these nice things to me, it was at a moment where despite all the time invested in the show and the quality of the work, I just wanted to give up and walk away.
I’m sure my fatigue would have come as a surprise to her, but it is a common part of what people call being “a really gifted guy”. Even me mentioning my gifts in that last sentence opens me up for criticism, though I don’t consider myself anything special because of them. But for talented people, even acknowledging your abilities can be seen as a character flaw and ego.
Over the years, I’ve worked with lots of talented people. You’d think when someone is greatly gifted, they’ve got it made. Often, the opposite is true. Talented people are just as resented as they are admired for their gifts. As a result, some of the most talented people I’ve known have also been the most troubled. Many are never comfortable in their own skin because of the negative attention their gifts bring.
“A man’s gift makes room for him, and brings him before great men” – Proverbs 18:16 is true, but it has a catch that few people understand. Talent gives you opportunities, but it also gives you obstacles. For every person who wants to herald your talent, there will be three who want him to hide it for envy or fear of its power.
I’ve seen several friendships destroyed simply because people I valued and respected couldn’t resist comparing their talents to mine. Though I’ve never thought I was anything to be envied, that never stopped insecure people from doing it.
And while talents do open doors for you, those doors can get locked behind you. Often people who want to harness your gifts for their goals end up limiting you out of fear you’ll outshine them or gain too much influence. So you find yourself being allowed to use only a fraction of what you do.
“Shine, baby, shine! Um…but just not too much”.
I suppose this sounds like whining – no one has sympathy for a gifted person having a pity party. But I’d like to encourage you to always encourage people, EVEN IF YOU THINK THEY DON’T NEED IT. Because, trust me, they do!
No matter how smart you think they are.
No matter how they seem to have “got it made”.
Remember, the very same things that bring them attention also make them a target.
So when you don’t think they need to hear that nice thing you’ve got to say, say it anyway. Something beautiful might end up being stillborn without you breathing a little life back into it.
With every great gift comes a multitude of great burdens. Trouble always comes as an accessory to talent. So take every opportunity to encourage people, especially the ones who shouldn’t need it. Because kind words are the fuel that creates wonderful things.